When my 6-year-old daughter Nari’s $50 bento box went missing, she said a classmate, Audrey, took it and wouldn’t give it back. The teacher brushed it off as “just a lunchbox,” so I went to the school and calmly took it back, making it clear that it mattered.

But days later, I was called in to meet the principal—and Audrey’s furious mom. She claimed I embarrassed her daughter. The principal suggested the girls share the lunchbox. I laughed. “Someone takes my daughter’s gift and the solution is sharing?”

It wasn’t just about a lunchbox. Nari is shy. Audrey is bold. The teacher admitted she hadn’t handled it well. She apologized and promised to talk to the class.

Later, Nari gave the box to Audrey on her own. “She said she only gets cheap ones… and just wanted to feel special.”

That changed everything.

So we bought Audrey a similar bento box—anonymously, with a kind note. Two days later, Nari said, “Audrey shared her cookie today.”

What I learned: Standing up for your kid is vital. But sometimes, the “mean kid” is just a hurting kid. We can teach boundaries—and still lead with kindness.