For weeks, my neighbor’s underwear was on full display outside my 8-year-old’s window. When Jake innocently asked if her thongs were slingshots, I knew it was time to put an end to this and teach Lisa a lesson in laundry etiquette.
It all started when Lisa moved in next door. One day, I glanced out Jake’s window and saw a collection of bright, lacy undergarments fluttering in the breeze. Jake noticed too and asked why Mrs. Lisa had her underwear outside. I quickly made up an excuse about her liking fresh air.
Days turned into weeks, and Jake kept asking about the “small” underwear. Finally, he wanted to hang his own superhero boxers outside. That’s when I decided to confront Lisa.
I went next door, trying to be polite, but Lisa wasn’t concerned. “It’s just clothes,” she shrugged. “Loosen up.”
Annoyed, I went home, grabbed my sewing machine, and created the world’s largest, most obnoxious granny panties—big enough to be a parachute. I hung them in front of Lisa’s window, hoping for a reaction.
When Lisa returned, she saw the giant underwear and screamed. I casually walked outside. “Love the new decor,” I said.
Lisa, red-faced, demanded I take it down. “Fine, I’ll move my laundry,” she said, defeated.
Since then, Lisa’s laundry has disappeared, and Jake was a little disappointed. As for me, I now proudly own a unique pair of flamingo curtains.